Angry

At my internship I’m co-facilitating a support group. During the team meeting, the co-facilitator handed me two articles regarding anger, which I read during the meeting. They were good articles and they got me to thinking about the incident on Sunday with the pancakes. I was angry that day, and I was unfairly blaming Ly for my bad decisions. I wanted to go up to him and yell so that it wouldn’t happen again. Luckily my anger abated enough for me to realize that it wasn’t his fault. But I also didn’t want to blame myself, because it would initiate self-bashing. That day I decided that it was no one’s fault. It was difficult, but I accepted my decisions and moved on in my life.

…But I didn’t really moved on, and it was nagging me. The anger. It had nowhere to go. I felt unresolved. The articles talked about how anger was so powerful that it can create or destroy, but like all forms of energy it doesn’t go no where. We can focus that energy to do with it what we want. I choose to focus that energy on losing weight.

Today I will start keeping track with what I eat. Wish me luck.